write/ older entries/ / miss miranda/ burningtheletters.net

2003-05-07 - 9:49 a.m. when i hear the band i think of you, driving around in your beat up old yellow car, talking life and pushing my butt back as far as it could go in the seat, settling in, being safe. sometimes tommy or tara would sit between us, no one would ever sit in the back seat. tara would joke about how it was like being in a time warp in your car, listening to the doors on the way to lunch or ccr on the way home. we tried to get you to listen to newer stuff, but it never really worked. it wasn't right. i rolled my eyes at the constant led zeppelin and your jim morrison t-shirts but i miss it now, i miss you now, i miss midnight confessions of feelings, i miss everything being such a huge deal, i miss the drama, i miss the 8 page letters, i miss you. i do, and the anger is just a defense. but you know that. and you refuse to talk, to smile, to anything. you may well be the biggest heart break i've ever experienced, the worse loss. ironic, no? girls aren't supposed to miss their best gay boy friends this much. but i do. and always will. ( 0 tell me?)